We got MARRIED!!!
On June 22, 2022, I married my love Clint Brown in Hawaii. We exchanged vows on the beach, and the view was just stunning and somewhat surreal. We didn’t tell anyone besides our therapists that it was going down, and it felt so exciting and right for us to just have the two of us there sharing that moment.
Of course, music was a most important aspect of the ceremony. We walked down the aisle together to Shania Twain’s “You’ve Got a Way” in recognition of Clint’s devotion to the legacy of Come On Over. I chose “Not the Only One” by Bonnie Raitt to play after we made it official with a kiss because Clint and I had already faced so much in life before we got together in 2015. I’m just gobsmacked by how much we have faced together since then. We have grown both individually and together as a result of our relationship. Plus, we are parents to five babies, who were all mentioned by name in the ceremony.
I’m so grateful to Reverend Rita for making sure this day was just perfect. She really took the time to center us and make sure we were present and taking in the moment. Also, her husband, Trace, took these gorgeous photos and edited them. Just stunning. Find her here.
After the ceremony, Clint and I got into our rental car to drive back to the hotel. We were both overwhelmed by what we’d just done, but we saw two rainbows on the hour-long drive. Talk about a sign from God. She really showed out.
In the past two weeks since we got married, everything has felt so right and grounded. Clint and I have been together for nearly eight years, but having this commitment to each other recognized with an official document from the government really does make a difference. It reminds me of something Beth Grant’s husband, actor Michael Chieffo, said about their long-term relationship. Instead of having lots of relationships with a lot of different people, he felt he’d had multiple relationships with Beth over the course of their marriage because of how they’d both grown and changed over time. That’s how it feels with Clint and me. I feel as though we’ve had three or four different relationships over the past few years thanks to breakthroughs for both of us in honesty and in working through our issues together.
Before Clint, I saw changes and opportunities for growth as an ending point for relationships. Sticking it out with Clint has been so rewarding. And looking at Clint now when we’re in public or just sitting around the house with the dogs and knowing he is my husband — it really is a new chapter in our story. It definitely feels like a new phase.
I didn’t grow up dreaming of this for myself. I didn’t see two men married when I was growing up. No one did. Now that I’m experiencing it, I’m so grateful to the people before me who dreamed big for marriage equality.
So, two days after our wedding, Clint and I woke up to the news that women’s reproductive rights had been gutted in America. And there was Clarence Thomas writing out plainly that our marriage was next on the chopping block.
This marriage is worth it. I intend to keep fighting for it. Here’s to the happiness and security I feel in my marriage to Clint.
Oh, and we did register for a few things. Find the registry here.
